Hold On One Minute

Hello, Jolee here.

Every once in a while, Dad goes a bit overboard and exaggerates a bit. This
whole, falling-off-the-chair bit was entirely misrepresented. It was staged!
I was merely being a good big sister and showing Shayna why she should be
very careful with chairs. What better way to teach a nine-month old than by
showing her? Besides, after a "serious" collision with an immobile object,
i.e. a wall, your parents are nicer to you and let you get away with more
stuff than they normally would.

As for the lollipop, that was part of the gimmick. If I have to hear one more
time about way back in 1988 when Dad jumped over a chain outside of the Greek
Bowl at Occidental, tripped and fell flat on his face, but managed to spill
not a single drop of beer out of his cup, I think I'm going to scream! My
hanging on to my lollipop was an attempt to parody his nostalgia for
insignificant events in his past. Clearly, this was way too sophisticated for
him to grasp, next time I try a little satire I'll simplify it for him. Boy,
I can't wait until I'm a teenager.

Anyway, don't worry, I'm okay. Don't panic. And this is my new e-mail
address. Dad thought it up. I will try and respond to any e-mail that I am
sent, but remember, I'm only three years old.

Love

Jolee